*munch crunch munch*

I LOVE FOOD!!!!

However...I do not love being a big girl.

I want to lose weight. But I don't want to give up eating delicious food...junk food...fast food...sweet food...greasy food...well, you get the idea. And I just don't know what to do.

Ok, so I KNOW what to do. I just don't know how to make myself do it. I have no self control. I have no motivation. All I do is sit on the couch like I'm waiting to grow into it. I chose tv and computer over getting up and moving. How in the hell do I break this cycle?

I feel so many things in my life are disjointed at this point. I need some glue or duct tape to start putting it all together.

...to be cont...

My Son: The Ball Player

My son is 6. And life would truly be boring without him...

Jace plays softball in a Miracle Youth League in our county. It's for kids up to age 18 that have a disability. Jace has cerebral palsy resulting from his birth at 24w gestation. We are blessed that it only mildly affects his motor skills so he's able to get out there and play pretty good...when he wants to. His attention span is about that of a fly! lol

So Sunday we arrive to the ball park all ready to play ball! I'm carrying Evie (2yr old daughter) who as soon as we start walking says, "Is hot." Which is a very accurate observation!

Jace plays his ball game where he periodically runs out of the dugout to me to let me know that ball players need to rest so he doesn't want to run anymore. He stands on the field (with his father at his side) and they are both looking bored out of their minds and fanning their shirts out. Can't blame them. After all "Is hot" out that day.

An hour later and the game is finally over...we're walking to the car. Dad and Evie ahead of us...Dad complaining we're never going again if it's over 80 degrees (Uh, hellO! It IS summer)... and Jace attempting to tell me something about, "coming here"
Here is our conversation:

Jace: " (inaudible) coming here (inaudible)"

Me: "What Jace?"

Repeat three times.

Me: "You like coming here?"

Jace: *stops walking & glares up at me* "I'd like to QUIT coming here!"

I can't wait for the next 4 Sundays! lol

Maybe if I Blog This Out I'll Quit Being Pissed

I am so pissed off I'm not in NYC today.

At first Husband was not thrilled with me going so I let it pass. Then brought it up again and he agreed I could go. YEA! So started making plans...even though the plans weren't coming together I was still thinking to try and make the best of it. NYC! NKOTB! RCMH!

So then Husband decides, "No Wife. You can't go." WTF? Seriously?

While the inner teenager that has been stirred in my soul thinks I'll just go ahead and go...the Mom in me says I can't do that. So Teen-Me and Mom-Me spent about a week arguing. And again... here my big ass sits on the couch. Mad. Sad. Disappointed I'm missing out.

My Twitter timeline is full of pics, fun and memories being made...FaceBook is full of the same. And I have no ill feelings towards everyone having the fun I'm just so jealous I can taste it. I don't like feeling jealous...I'm really blessed in life so jealousy isn't something that I'm used to.

Whatever the next NKOTB adventure may be...COUNT ME IN LADIES! I've already made the executive decision to go...and whatever I have to do to make it happen will be alright with me.

Dear NKOTB Gods,
Please let them tour again. Please don't let this ride be over.
Or at the very least let Jordan finish his solo stuff and make a tour across the States...
AMEN.

Not Much Has Changed

So I found this from Blog Attempt #2 - 1 year and 1 week later it's still relevant. LOL!
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Blogging: Day 1

So why am I blogging?

I'm not entirely sure. I've always enjoyed writing. Since getting married and starting a family it's not something I do anymore. I used to write some short stories and a lot of poetry, even had some published. I always wanted to write a novel. Something romantic and meaningful...

But anyhow.

I'm Aubrey, nice to meet you. I have 1 husband, 2 kids, 2 dogs and 3 cats. I think I need one more husband to help round out the numbers. :) I live in the country. I love food. I struggle with my weight. I love to laugh. I LOVE to hear my kids laugh! I hate the herb rosemary. I love New Kids on the Block! I love animals. I have tattoos. I have personal strength that 5 years ago I didn't know I have. I know Depression. I love warm days. I love rainy days. I hate snow. I watch too much reality tv. I'm funny. I'm forgetful. And that's a little bit about me.

See you tomorrow!

Hi. I'm Aubrey. :)

I bet you're wondering why you're reading this. That makes two of us.

This is actually the third time I've attempted blogging. It's like dieting. I can never stick with it. But I used to do a lot of writing, it was a great release for me. And I know a lot of other people find blogging very therapeutic. Perhaps the third time will be a charm...

I have no clue if there will be any "focus" for my blog. I'm sure it will contain a lot of mom talk, a lot of "weight" talk and a lot of New Kids on the Block talk! That's right. New Kids on the Block. You can insert any joke you'd like at this point and I could care less. There are few things in my life I've loved longer than NKOTB!

And as I start this (possibly ill fated) blog I should actually be in NYC for their Radio City Music Hall concerts. Instead I find myself on the couch with my laptop debating if I want to eat a Snickers. And I fear that is as exciting as this weekend is going to get...

But I could be proven wrong! With two young kids unexpected excitement may be just around the corner!

See..."mom"..."weight"..."NKOTB".